dissociation

it’s a kind of magic
a necromancy

when you’ve gotta scream
you’ve gotta cry
you’ve gotta curl up in a ball and die
when you just can’t take another instant

sometimes

suddenly

… nothing …

the pain’s still there
the despair’s still there
there’s sickness and tiredness and hopelessness there

but you’re not

you’re gone
you’re dead
you’re

… nothing …

still walking
not feeling
still talking
not caring
still eating
not living

refuge without relief
numb not comfortable
not uncomfortable

… nothing …

some can’t take it
they cut
they burn
just to feel pain
to just live again

why bother?
why care?
you’re dead a long time
might as well get used to it

… nothing …

isn’t it wonderful
the horrible things
a mind will do to itself

inspired by White Pearl