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Why do I lie all the time?

16/07/2013

I look back over the stuff I’ve written and think “Why do I spout so much bullshit?”.

Sometimes its obvious.

I’m trying to impress. Big note myself.

Or I’m embarrassed or ashamed and trying to hide or disguise something.

Sometimes I think I will entertain people more by ’embellishing’ the facts. But could it be worth misleading them to entertain them? I probably wouldn’t want them to do that to me. I must be doing it for myself again. To make myself look good.

Sometimes its because I think I do have something to say, but can’t say it properly. So I say something else instead. What’s the point of that?

Or I lie to try to avoid the consequences of my own words and deeds.
Telling lies, for instance.

A lot of the time I just don’t know at all.

Habit? Conditioning? Aping other liars?

I’m probably even lying to myself about the reasons.

I’m definitely lying to you.

Do you lie all the time like me?
Do you too have trouble coping with it?

Here’s an exercise I’ve found helpful.

Every morning when you first wake up, say to yourself –
“I will be more truthful!”
“I will be more honest!”
“I will be more sincere!”

With those whoppers out of the way the rest of the day’s lying is a piece of cake.

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From → confusion

5 Comments
  1. Rexie permalink

    Cabrogal,

    To lie is to have an intention to deceive. Looks like you are idea of lying is to be accountable to all kinds of human beings. I am over human beings now, honestly. I find them to be a ‘confederacy of dunces’. So considering this, is it wrong to lie to liars and also, is it wrong to utter a white lie when needed?

    I find it the most hardest and scariest to lie to the Divine. When one takes a decision never to lie to the Lord, one never utters a lie that is unutterable and all such doubts vanish.

    Rex.

    Like

    • Do you really have to develop an intention to lie?
      Or can it come automatically as a habit?

      I don’t think I really believe in white lies for the simple reason that I wouldn’t want someone to ‘white lie’ to me. I may or may not find it patronising but I would definitely be unhappy about being fed false information.

      My family has a bit of a tradition of lying and when I first realised as a teenager that I’d inherited it I set about trying to cure myself of lying.

      It’s been an exercise of dubious effectiveness.

      Objectively I may lie less now but I’ve also become more sensitive to my own lies so subjectively I feel just as dishonest as I’ve ever been.

      What’s worse is that the more I try to overcome my own lies the more dishonest everyone else seems to be. I even wrote a semi-ironic poem about it.

      I thought I could find truth in the world with knowledge.
      I could not. There is none.

      I thought I could find truth in other people with morality.
      If it exists I am blind to it.

      I can see no truth whatsoever anywhere in the universe.

      And suddenly I know why.

      I am the truth.

      I don’t think I lie to the Divine because I don’t speak to it.
      I try to listen instead.
      And I have to listen very hard because It speaks not.

      Like

  2. Rexie permalink

    Just to clarify, when I said “I find them to be a ‘confederacy of dunces’”, I include myself as well.

    Like

  3. Rexie permalink

    Do you really have to develop an intention to lie?

    You cannot lie without knowing you are lying. I mean, what you don’t know you don’t know. It can come definitely as a habit but like I said, you may not notice the habit but if a voice prodded you to examine, you will know that you are or have been lying.

    White lie is not just about feeding false information. That would tantamount to simply lying, isn’t it? One uttering a white lie just wants to protect your feelings, that’s all. Chances are that if you don’t white lie to others, they will not white lie to you. Chances are that if you don’t white lie to others, you will instance catch them when they trick you. So feel safe Cabrogal. It must be all okay around you 🙂

    What’s worse is that the more I try to overcome my own lies the more dishonest everyone else seems to be.

    Perfect, couldn’t agree more! This happens because the sensitivity of one’s consciousness expands from oneself to others. I tend to call this sensitivity negative empathy where you feel not the pain and suffering of others and love them more, but instead seeing all the ugliness and dirt in others very clearly makes us unable to bring any positive feelings for them. We might at best remain neutral or it could deeply upset us. This is just a beginning. It is said the a sufficiently wide consciousness proceeds from seeing the darkness in oneself and others to understanding its meaning and its true place in the world.

    A beautiful poem that was!

    Like

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